stevie_b Posted November 14, 2014 Share Posted November 14, 2014 I also find these posts an interesting read. You've achieved amazing things with Nath. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesy Posted November 14, 2014 Share Posted November 14, 2014 Incredible and inspiring mate, keep up the good work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorin Posted November 14, 2014 Share Posted November 14, 2014 I also keep reading the thread for the updates, keep it up sir! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clay Posted November 14, 2014 Share Posted November 14, 2014 I read it mate . and you do come across a one top dad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted December 7, 2014 Author Share Posted December 7, 2014 Well xmas is coming, Im hoping nath understands it a bit more this year we opened a present early (chocs) and he helped unwrap it which is quite major for him. He took my wifes finger the other day and was using it to point to his toy story book, then waiting for her to tell him who each person was which is great interaction. Onward Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supra matt Posted December 7, 2014 Share Posted December 7, 2014 Well xmas is coming, Im hoping nath understands it a bit more this year we opened a present early (chocs) and he helped unwrap it which is quite major for him. He took my wifes finger the other day and was using it to point to his toy story book, then waiting for her to tell him who each person was which is great interaction. Onward Hi mate thats really good news for you guys im pleased the littel man is making good progress you got him lots of cool presents, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted December 7, 2014 Author Share Posted December 7, 2014 Nath is hard to buy for he does not really play with toys but we have got him a tv for his room. So he can watch his toy story DVDs in his space if he wants some time out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abz Posted December 8, 2014 Share Posted December 8, 2014 Fantastic updates, I also enjoy reading these & want you to know we think you are a tremendous father. Remember that you might feel bad but you are only doing this for his own good. I admire everything you do and as a couple it must be tough on the relationship, but it makes you all stronger. Make sure you keep us updated and if we can help in anyway then please do let us know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hitbox Junkie Posted December 8, 2014 Share Posted December 8, 2014 Hats off to you fella your doing a great job i do not know you but i have read through the entire thread and just felt all your ups and downs. On wards and up wards for the future and i hope your son, you, your misses and family have a great christmas. From Ant & Hannah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonball Posted December 8, 2014 Share Posted December 8, 2014 Total respect for you all. Please keep these updates coming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted December 17, 2014 Author Share Posted December 17, 2014 Nath let me cut his hair this week major major step forward that most of the time has to end with me holding him while kel does her best and ends in tears. He did his school play like a good boy although he had been up since midnight so he was a little sleepy. I have to say i love his school the people that work there love those kids, and i think the kids love them back. Yeah i will admit to crying when i left its just so hard not to when you see the lil kids in the wheel chairs dressed as angels and stars. So as a reward i put his tv up in his room for him, i told him father xmas saw him being so good and said he could have it early, i dont know if he understood me or not but he is very happy with being able to watch an hour of Mickey mouse/toy story before bed it seems to help to relax and switch off. I guess at some point i will copy this whole thread and turn it into a blog in the hope at some point in time someone else will be starting to deal with this kind of thing and work out they are not alone. On a personal note, as stupid as it sounds, im starting to take my level 3 child care. I feel i could do a job as a Teaching assistant in naths school (once i toughen up) there are hardly any males in the school and alot of the kids seem to want to play and interact with me when im there with nath. The money is shocking but i guess ive never done anything i wanted to do work wise ive done what i have to so i figure i may enjoy it and give something back. When you talk to the mums/carers turns out most of these guys up and leave as they dont deal with things very well. I would also guess that while some of it is because they are dicks, most of it will be from having no one to talk to, no one that understands. So i am also trying to start a dads club around the school, somewhere that the new dads can sit down have a moan a laugh and just work stuff out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevie_b Posted December 17, 2014 Share Posted December 17, 2014 I guess at some point i will copy this whole thread and turn it into a blog in the hope at some point in time someone else will be starting to deal with this kind of thing and work out they are not alone. ... So i am also trying to start a dads club around the school, somewhere that the new dads can sit down have a moan a laugh and just work stuff out. Both are really good ideas. You're an inspiration. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abz Posted December 18, 2014 Share Posted December 18, 2014 Both are really good ideas. You're an inspiration. This! Nath is very lucky to have a father like you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted January 22, 2015 Author Share Posted January 22, 2015 (edited) Xmas has come and gone and this year was better. Nath opened a few gifts before withdrawing a little. His sleeping has improved massively, so in your face doctors who said drug him. However we have found out he hasn't seen a speech specialist for 6 months. A child of nearly 6 that cant talk that is totally unacceptable. Last we where told was he was getting it at school and being taken out of class once a week. So we kicked up a stink and now have a meeting next week to try and sort it out. Little bugger still refuses hats and gloves resulting in a cold child when we walk the dog/lion. Saying that he has started to play with Koda he will lay on the floor and wait for him to come over and try and get his toy. For a 8 stone dog he is really gentle with him and it shows nath has interest in playing with others. cracking on with the toilet training, we have been saving for a while and want to take him to Disney world and it would be alot better if he was out of nappies. Dads club kinda failed. All the dads are working and or buggered off which is a shame. My other plan tho is still in affect by September i want to be working in the nursery dept of the school.# I did however meet an awesome guy whos son has alot of issues. The chap had resuscitated his son 3 times!!!!!!!!!! and despite what he was told his son is still with us/talking/walking. So i guess i took a bit more of a never give up attitude from that. Edited January 22, 2015 by The Raven (see edit history) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luxluc Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 Great to read that mate. A great location that is awesome for children of ANY age is the "Europa Park" in Germany http://www.europapark.de/en I have been there a couple of times, and it is really perfect imo. Little Nath would certainly enjoy, as there are attractions for really every age. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dragonball Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 You are an awesome guy mate... but seriously! So much respect for you and these updates are fantastic - might I suggest that you think about compiling and publishing your anecdotes and experience - both success / failures for others? (if you have not already done so?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted January 22, 2015 Author Share Posted January 22, 2015 (edited) Yeah i do want to do that. But i don't really know how. I offered to hold talks for new parents at the local center but never got taken up on it. Its all very well sitting in a room with a paid "professional" who tells you doom and gloom but never really getting it. Much better to hear from someone that has been though it and understands. I know i go on about it but the sad thing is the males in these family's. To often the mothers are cuddled, spoke to to and cared for. All the time the dad is left on his own to deal with it. My mates dont bring nath up other than passing "how is he" Not one of them has ever asked me how i feel about it. I guess its not the bloke way, the result was for a long time i started to hate the people around me for not caring. When the truth is they probably do but dont know how to bring it up or were not ready for the resulting conversion The end result for in alot of cases is the dad shuts off (which is what i did) or worse leaves the family unit at a time when it needs him the most, im not saying all of them leave because of this some of them are just douche bags. But i think alot of it could be avoided if people looked at the family as a whole and offered help. I wasn't offered any kind of counseling or anyone to talk to until it was to late. Finding out your child might never talk or remain at the mental age of 6 forever is a horrific thing to go though made worse when you cant turn to anyone. Who knows maybe one day i will try and write a book about it. I would hope no one with a supra will ever be in the same place as me and have to read this, To be honest im almost embarrassed to have written some of the stuff i have. This is probably not the time or place to be sharing it all. However someone might stumble on it and it may help someone out one day. Edited January 22, 2015 by The Raven (see edit history) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevie_b Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 I would hope no one with a supra will ever be in the same place as me and have to read this, To be honest im almost embarrassed to have written some of the stuff i have. This is probably not the time or place to be sharing it all. However someone might stumble on it and it may help someone out one day. I'm convinced that this is the time and place to be sharing it. You never know who's out there reading it, feeling helpless/frustrated about the situation, like you said it might help someone out some day, or might be doing that already. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorin Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 I still read all the updates, glad to hear Nath seems to be doing well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luxluc Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 I read every post you do mate. Please continue to write on our forum. I cannot imagine how your life must be, and I am very honest in saying I hope to never have to be in such a situation, but I have ENORMOUS respect for you. It must sometimes be hard at the end of a day when you sit on your couch and think about the day that just passed. The fact that you plan to do as much as possible with Nath is great ; I can imagine that even though he can not show you emotionally how much he enjoys, deep down in his heart he will. I wish you both a nice week-end. Please, keep us posted. I am very interested to read about your life. Best regards Luc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted February 3, 2015 Author Share Posted February 3, 2015 Just been listening to Mr Fry, and radio kent talk about god/altering a baby Its a tough one, i have to believe that we where given nath because we can deal with it. If thats true who knows but it comforts me so hey ho. I tend to believe in an afterlife, so therefore i have to think about a supreme being. SO then i would have to ask why? Having seen so many kids with disabilities why would a god do that. Radio kent where talking about putting in another persons genes to alter the DNA of a child so its rids the genes of defects. Much in the same way a dog that isn't a pedigree is less likely to have issues. Which got me thinking would i take nathans disability away if i could or would it alter who he is? My first thought was yes, id give anything for him to live a normal life. But then i got thinking. If he never grows up and is stuck with a mental age of say 7? is that so bad? I remember being 7 and it was all good. No money issues, job stress, i could look after myself more or less. Being 7 forever might not be a bad thing. On a brighter note, the family have all clubbed together and got him a sit on electric car for his birthday. It has a remote control so i can steer and power it for him as i dont think he will understand how to use it. I will film him and post it up if he enjoys it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hitbox Junkie Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 Great to hear about him getting his own wheels . look forward to the video can only imagine the enjoyment hes going to have rolling around in it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted February 5, 2015 Author Share Posted February 5, 2015 http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/KIDS-BIG-24V-JEEP-ELECTRIC-CHILDRENS-RIDE-ON-REMOTE-CONTROL-TOY-CAR-CARS-/390657943459 Thats the one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorin Posted February 5, 2015 Share Posted February 5, 2015 http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/KIDS-BIG-24V-JEEP-ELECTRIC-CHILDRENS-RIDE-ON-REMOTE-CONTROL-TOY-CAR-CARS-/390657943459 Thats the one. Thats pretty cool. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Raven Posted February 18, 2015 Author Share Posted February 18, 2015 (edited) Nath in his car, and me crashing him into a hole. He likes it but its a bit slow, i wonder if i could mod it and make it go faster? Im quiting my job in the next few weeks, pending being accepted to work with young disabled adults in day care. Stepping stone to get into Nath special needs school Edited February 18, 2015 by The Raven (see edit history) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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