tonyhawk

into, not ino, sorry, bad fingers...

will be allowed ino the

...rather old, brown, Morris Minor...

..the armpits of really big...

...uses go faster super cream...

...the clap clinic phone number...

...but I forgot the key...

...little green men all doing...

...pops in with a big...

...but when they got there...

...pretty tricycles nice and clean...

...but it might not be...

...the voices told me to...

Code 42 No 1 Speed Sensor Signal Circuit (Open or short in no. 1 speed sensor circuit)

When I bought mine, it had a naff gadget on it for reading revs, speed etc., when I ripped it out, I got exactly the same problem, no lights, then a few minutes later, they came on. In my case, it was a wire that I hadn't put back properly on the ECU under the passenger's carpet/footwell. If not, then have a look at: http://www.mkiv.co.nz/ Then go to 'Technical' and then 'Engine diagnostic codes. How to read them' Hope this helps.

So long as my baby's working, I'll be there (clutch and flywheel on order, old one rusting on my balcony...), sunds like a giggle.

Oh gee thanks...

Two kids are up in front of the judge for possession of drugs [The Judge] “As this is your first offence, and given your young age, I am reluctant to put you in prison; as such, I am willing to give you an alternative; go out this weekend and convince as many people as you can to stop taking drugs; if, on Monday morning, I feel that you have done a good job, then I will let you go, if not, the you will do time” Back in the courtroom, Monday morning, the judge asks the first guy: “ok, so how many people did you convince?” To which the kid replied: “17” “17” says the judge, “that’s very good, how did you do it” “Well”, says the kid, “I drew them a two circles, a big one, and a small one. I pointed to the big one and said ‘that’s your brain before you take drugs’, then I point to the small one and say ‘and that’s you brain after you take them’, for most that was enough, and they swore never to take drugs again” “That’s very commendable”, says the judge, “you may go” He turns to the second kid and asks the same question “56”, says the kid “56!” says the judge, “how?” “well”, says the kid, “mine was a very similar idea; I too drew two circles, a small one, then a big one; then I say, if you do drugs, you’ll go to prison, and (pointing to the small circle), this is your ar$ehole before you to prison……”

Is that after she fell out of the ugly tree, hitting every branch on the way down?

I don't like the nose on the LF-A, but it is supposed to be fitted with a 5L V10, pushing 500+bhp from the factory, which does give it some respect. Also, you know that being a Toyota engine, it'll probably handle double that!... Add a body kit, a few engine tweaks.... I like the side profile though:

The last time I tried Elephant (about 18 months ago), they wouldn't even offer me monthly payment terms? I got a quote, which was £1700 as my NCB was on my Lexus, and they guy asked for the payment; when I said, "I'm sorry but I don't have a spare £1700 at the moment!" he simply said "Then we can't insure you"....?!? Then I went to Direct Line, who were insuring my Lexus, and they said: "we wont insure that car (Supe) without NCB", "but my NCB is on my Lex, which you are currently insuring?" "Errr...." So I say: "How about transferring the NCB to my Supe then, and hiking the premium for my Lex?" "We won't insure the Lexus without NCB" "!?!" In the end they changed the vehicle on my lexus policy to my Supra, and then re-insured my Lexus without NCB, which 10 minutes earlier they said they couldn't do! The odd thing was, my Supra is a lower group than my 8 year old LS400, so I got a hugh premium reduction on the change of vehicle, and when adding the Lex as 3PFT, the two policies were cheaper than my original Lex as FC?!? I think they just roll a dice and see what premium they fancy charging at the time?

Trucks, as with white vans, busses, cabs, kids on mopeds and cyclists are exempt from the highway code; did you not know that?... For this sub-set of road traffic, mirrors, indicators, red lights and general observation are all optional...

Do you still buy cakes for everyone on your second birthday?

A Scooby? As in the cars that Chav's dream of owning after their Nova's?

I worked at Microsoft about 10 years ago doing support for Windows for Workgroups (for those who remember!), and while I was there I received loads of stupid calls, but a call my mate took beats them all hands down: This call went on for 45 minutes; it was a printing problem, where the user was stating that it simply wouldn't print; my mate tried every trick in the book to get something to come out, but to no avail. After 45 minutes, he was about to give up, and told the user that it was almost certainly a hardware problem, but then asked, rather apologetically, "The printer is on, isn't it?", to which the user said: "Oh, has it got to be on for these tests?..." My mate had to very calmly state that "Yes, this was necessary", and start all over again....