>Out on her royal yacht the queen was enjoying the sea air when she spied
>a man in the water off the port bow - clearly being menaced by a very
>large shark.
>Through her binoculars she could see it was Christian Ronaldo,
>struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 20 foot shark!
>The queen ordered the captain to change course to try and save the poor
>man, but she knew the yachts top speed would never get them there in
>time.
>At that exact moment a speedboat containing three men wearing white tops
>sped into view. One of the men took aim at the shark and fired a harpoon
>into its ribs, immobilising it instantly. The other two reached out and
>pulled Ronaldo from the water and, using long clubs, beat the shark to
>death.
>They bundled the bleeding, semi-conscious Ronaldo into the speedboat
>along with the dead shark and prepared for a hasty retreat, when they
>heard frantic calling ...... It was the Queen calling them to the yacht.
>
>On reaching yacht the Queen went into raptures about the rescue and
>said, "I'll give you a knighthood for your brave actions. I thought the
>England team would hate Ronaldo after the world cup. But I see that the
>England team are true heroes and should serve as a model for
>sportsmanship to other countries." She knighted them and sailed away.
>As she departed Rooney asked the others, "Who was that?!"
>"That," Beckham answered, "was our Queen. She rules the Commonwealth and
>knows everything about our country."
>"Well," Rooney replied, "she knows F all about shark fishing. How's the
>bait holding up?"