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Cringe worthy joke of the day.


garetheves

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One day God says to Noah,

 

"Noah, i want you to build be another Ark."

 

Noah replies, "Not a problem boss, what exactly are you after?"

 

"I want an ark with many levels to it this time,"

 

Noah: "Many levels? Gotcha, what else?"

 

God: "And instead of all animals i want it stocked entirely with fish."

 

Noah: "Just fish God??"

 

"Yes, in fact specifically just Koi Carp"

 

Noah: "Ok let me sum this up, you want a new Ark, with many levels, stocked entirely with Koi Carp? But why God?"

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Wait for it, believe me its worth it.

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God: "Because i want a multistory Carp Ark. :D

 

Ill get my coat....:taped: :run:

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It is just before the England v Brazil match. Ronaldinho goes into the

Brazilian changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum.

 

"What's up?" he asks.

 

"Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for this game. We know it's

important but it's only England. They're sh*te and we can't be bothered."

 

Ronaldinho looks at them and says, "Well, I reckon I can beat them by

myself. You lads go down the pub."

 

So Ronaldinho goes out to play England by himself and the rest of the

Brazilian team go off for a few jars.

 

After a few pints they wonder how the game is going, so they get the

landlord to put the teletext on. A big cheer goes up as the screen reads "

Brazil 1 - England 0 (Ronaldinho 10 minutes)". He is beating England all

by himself!

 

Anyway, a few pints later and the game is forgotten until someone

remembers, "It must be full time now, let's see how he got on." They put

the teletext on.

 

"Result from the Stadium 'Brazil 1 (Ronaldinho 10 minutes) - England 1

(Lampard 89 minutes)."

 

They can't believe it; he has single-handedly got a draw against England!!

They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate Ronaldinho. They find him

inthe dressing room, still in his gear, sitting with his head in his

hands.

 

He refuses to look at them. "I've let you down, I've let you down."

 

"Don't be daft, you got a draw against England, all by yourself. And they

only scored at the very, very end!"

 

"No, no, I have, I've let you down. …………………………………………………………………….

 

I got sent off after 12 minutes."

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My sister's favourite joke that one. My mum's is...

 

What did Hitler tell his men just before they got into their tanks?

 

 

 

Get into the tanks men.

 

 

 

They'll laugh at anything my family.

 

 

That is very funny!:D that's my new fave:)

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