garetheves Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for six days. Eventually, Archangel Michael found him on the seventh day resting. He enquired of God, "Where have you been?" God pointed downards through the clouds. "Look Michael, look whatI've made" said God. Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said,"What is it?" "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put life on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance." "Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused. God explained, pointing down to different parts of the Earth. "For example, North America will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while South America is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot, and Russia will be a cold spot. Over there I've placed a continent of white people and over there is a continent of black people." God continued, pointing to the different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid and while this one will be very cold and covered in ice." The Archangel, impressed by Gods work, then pointed to another area of land and asked, "Whats that?" "Ah," said God."That's the North of England,the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful people, seven Premiership football teams in the North West alone, and many impressive cities; it is the home of the world's finest artists, musicians, writers, thinkers, explorers and politicians. The people from the North of England are going to be modest, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found travelling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, hard working and high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as speakers of the truth." Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance God, you said there will be BALANCE!" God replied very wisely, "Wait till you see thebunch of to$$ers I'm putting down South!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewen Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 :dand:spank: oh hang on Im from the North have another:d Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobSheffield Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 too true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom S Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 Like it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kopite Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 Thought you said it was a joke? Everything you said is true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperSupra Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 very nice, and so true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marco Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 What about the midlands lol? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MONKEYmark Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 lol funny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorin Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlotte Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 I don't get it, is it because i'm southern? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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