adnanshah247 Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Read this at work and made me laugh so i thought i'd post it:- One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it. Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fizzle Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 hahaha nice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndrewOW Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 I hope your girlfriend doesn't get to see this I may have heard this before, but it is funny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_Lynz_ Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marcAB10 Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missile Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Funny. Would not have the guts to try this myself... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShamelessTT Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 that is brill!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marc_p Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2JG Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 brilliant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustGav Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 I thought the title was sufficient Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr lover Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ewen Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 I thought the title was sufficient damn, beat me to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adnanshah247 Posted August 5, 2008 Author Share Posted August 5, 2008 I thought the title was sufficient LOL, honestly any guy to do that must be brave and wanting a divorce. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Franko Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Good for a repost Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustGav Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 LOL, honestly any guy to do that must be brave and wanting a divorce. My ex threatened to leave if I bought a dvd player and projector... one home cinema later and she still didn't get the hint. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
couv3z Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 priceless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedM Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=109644 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showpost.php?p=1542016&postcount=20 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carlos T Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 very good one, gf likes that one aswell:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
erol_h Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 very funny might give it a try Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyB Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Very good that one Who cares if its a repost, i too am one of the many people who dont spend all day everyday looking at the forum to see it the last time it may have been posted! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedM Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Don't you roll your eyes at me, young man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DannyB Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anees Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndrewOW Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showthread.php?t=109644 http://www.mkivsupra.net/vbb/showpost.php?p=1542016&postcount=20 As I said, I thought I'd seen that one before Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now