keener Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 COSHH - Hazardous Materials Information Bulletin Material Safety Data Sheet. Woman - A Chemical Analysis. Element: Woman Symbol: ♀ Discoverer: Adam Atomic Mass: Accepted as 53.6 kg but known to vary from 40-400 kg Distribution: Copious quantities in all urban areas. Physical Properties. Surface usually covered with a paint film. Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason. Melts if given special treatment. Bitter if incorrectly used. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore. Yields to pressure applied to correct points. Chemical Properties. Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason. Insoluble in liquids but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man. Common Uses. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars. Can be a great aid to relaxation. Very effective cleaning agent. Tests. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen. Hazards. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come in to direct contact. Safety Controls. Keep at a distance when in volatile condition. Isolate from sources of wealth. Never store more than 3 together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vicky Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyT Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supra_aero Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 That's the funniest post I have seen in years. Pity I can't send it around the office for obvious reasons. love the atomic mass part and affinity with gold and precious metals. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imi Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 LOL - so true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluecoup Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 sent to girlfriend fingers crossed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndrewOW Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Excellent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holden1989 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 that makes us sound almost dangerous lol who am i kidding, half of that is true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndrewOW Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 that makes us sound almost dangerous lol who am i kidding, half of that is true What do you mean by 'only' half? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ivan Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I see they haven't updated it since HAZMAT forms came in then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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