How to be more PC.

[jamesmark]

Sorry for the late posting and if it is a repost but the Mail was late.

 

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America ,Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES."

 

You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.

 

And further more HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

 

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" -- She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."

 

2. She is not "EASY" -- She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

 

3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" -- She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THEINFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

 

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" -- She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

 

5 . She does not "NAG" you -- She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

 

6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" -- She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

 

 

 

 

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

 

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAINSTORAGE FACILITY."

 

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" -- He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

 

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" -- He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVEDESTINATIONS."

 

4. He is not "BALDING" -- He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

 

5. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" -- He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

 

6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants -- It's "REARCLEAVAGE